Mindfully Serene

When we experience trauma, it can leave a lasting impact—not just emotionally but also on how our brain processes and stores memories. Understanding these effects can help us be more compassionate toward ourselves as we heal. When speaking about trauma, we usually refer to them as ‘Little T’ or ‘Big T’ traumas. 

Big “T” Trauma refers to major, life-altering events that are deeply distressing, such as abuse, serious accidents, or natural disasters. These events are typically what people think of when they hear the word “trauma.”

Little “t” Trauma includes less obvious but still emotionally impactful experiences, such as repeated criticism, feeling rejected, or facing chronic stress. While these events might seem “smaller,” their effects can build up over time and be just as significant.

It is really important to note that both types of trauma are valid and deserving of compassion and support. 

One of the brain’s key functions is to detect danger and respond quickly to keep us safe. During a traumatic experience, the brain’s alarm system activates, triggering a fight, flight, or freeze response. This reaction is automatic and helps us survive threatening situations. This is a response our body has had since the beginning of time. Back in the stone-age, if we came into contact with a hungry bear, we needed this response to help us try and fight the bear, freeze so the bear hopefully wouldn’t see us, or run away from the bear. All of these responses are, ultimately, an attempt to try and save our lives. 

However, trauma can cause this alarm system to become overly sensitive, making us feel on edge or anxious even when there is no immediate danger. The brain may start to interpret neutral events as threatening, causing intense emotional reactions. It’s almost like the alarm has become super sensitive, and any slight knock will set it off and trigger this ‘urgent’ response.

At the same time, trauma can disrupt how the brain organizes and stores memories. Usually, the brain files memories in a clear and orderly way, but trauma can overwhelm this process. Instead of placing the event in the past, the brain might store it as if it’s still happening, making the memory feel vivid and difficult to forget. This can result in fragmented or blurry recollections, making it hard to recall events clearly or in sequence. Because our brain hasn’t had a chance to ‘date and time stamp’ the memory, when the memory comes to the forefront of our mind, it may feel like we are back in the moment & the memory is happening right in the here-and-now. During my work, when I am describing this to clients, we speak about how usually our memories are organised neatly in a filing cabinet. However, with trauma memories, this doesn’t happen, meaning our memories resemble a messy office. There’s paper all over, most of it isn’t dated or organised well. 

The good news is that the brain is resilient and capable of healing through a process called neuroplasticity. Therapy approaches like trauma-focused cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR), mindfulness, and grounding exercises can help calm the brain’s alarm system and improve how memories are processed.

If you’ve experienced trauma, remember that your brain has been working hard to protect you. Struggling with memory gaps, feeling on edge, or experiencing emotional triggers doesn’t mean something is wrong with you—it means your brain is responding to what it has been through. With time, support, and the right tools, healing is possible, and you can regain a sense of peace and safety within yourself. I know that, when you’re going through it, it feels horrendous! However, everything our brains are doing, they’re doing to try to keep us safe and help us survive. It can be helpful to remember this. 

This is something I really wanted to share as I remember learning about the way trauma alters our brain and feeling such a huge sense of relief. It almost felt like it wasn’t my fault the way I was dealing with things, but rather my brain had literally changed which isn’t something I can control! And that’s why I really wanted to share this explanation, with the hopes it will help someone else in a similar way.

It isn’t your fault that your brain responds differently to things, due to the trauma you have faced. It isn’t your fault, that your memories are stored differently or your alarm system is more faulty. 

It isn’t your fault that the trauma(s) you have endured, be them big T or little T, have had such a big impact on you.

Whilst it may not feel like it now, you CAN and WILL get through this.

All my love,

T x